Thursday, 20 January 2011


No one tells you that when you grow up, you will become a miserable being with less of a heart, accompanied by a big pile of muddled ideals and a crapload of cynicism. No one prepares you for the hurdles of having to be an adult, no one tells you of the shortfalls of debt, the scars past loves leave and mutate into, the constant struggle of looking cool or productive in a society obsessed with image and success. Yes, no one prepares you for these...but you somewhat have an idea. You somehow can expect these when in high school your guidance counselor asks you what you would like to do and how to prepare for it (in my case, the ghetto high school I went to, it was more of a "please, try not to get shot"). But....you enter university and you forget just how miserable life really is. You immerse yourself in ideals, alcohol, weed, good conversations, foreign films, documentaries that confuse the shit out of you, constant articles and essays that bore the fuck out of you, and heedless sessions of making out with random strangers whom you call friends.

You forget that this is the best period of your life; so you abuse it, you love it and then you can't wait to get it over with and become the much-awaited adult that "they" and "you" have been preparing all this time. Then that moment comes and you are slapped with the harsh reality of the boredom and disillusion of "making it on your own". You learn student loans are the devil, interest rates will choke the life out of you, graduate school (if you want to be a "normal, respected" person) is an imminent cloud of rain on your parade, dating (shithole) is the biggest bitch out there, and of course, you need to deal with the looming precipice of marriage as well.

Ah, life is good. So good!!!
You are finally making some shitty money (where 35% of your miserable entry level position gets eaten up by taxes), wasting it all still on booze and friends (university life is hard to get rid of), clothes to look like you are more accomplished than you are, and oh yes...in my case, supporting your whole fucking family. That's right, can't you see rainbows over me? I can taste the bitterness of emancipation and 45,000dollars investment in nothing except some good parties and a few bits of information shared.

Where has real education gone? Where is my money's worth? Canada, why did you promise me a fake dream?

In the words of the sailor within me: FUCK YOU!

2 comments:

Ael said...

:(
këtej, tani që po të shkruaj ora është 00:09. Sapo lexova postimin tënd dhe po shkoj të fle, gjithë mërzi... S'të shkruaj dot më pëlqeu!

Flm që kujtohesh edhe për ne :).

Ocean drift... said...

Thanks, Ela...me behet qejfi qe ti kujtohesh per mua ;)